Homecoming King

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Wifey’s Weekly Q and A

Dear Wifey:

My husband’s college homecoming is at the end of the month and he wants to go without me. He says that none of his friends’ wives are going and he wants to hang with the boys. I’ve heard so many crazy stories about his college days and am a little worried about him going without me. What should I do?

- Mrs. Homecoming King

Dear Mrs. Homecoming King:

I understand that you have a little bit of anxiety about your husband heading back to his college homecoming without you, but do you really have anything to be concerned about? Ask yourself a few questions: how long ago was he in college; do I trust him; has he ever given me any reason to think that he would be unfaithful; and how would he feel if he knew I doubted him?

The answers to these questions should help alleviate your fears. Unless you truly believe he would act inappropriately – in that case you should explore why you think that and consider addressing the issue on a deeper level – plan a girlfriends’ weekend or catch up on some “me time” and send him on his way.

Winks & Smiles,

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How about you? Would you help your husband pack; or pitch a fit? Wondering wives want to know?

The advice on this site is intended to be helpful, but is not meant to take the place of marital counseling, legal advice, financial advice or any other professional service. If you feel you need professional help, it is encouraged for you to get some.

14 comments:

Nancy October 7, 2009 at 8:37 AM  

I would love to think I could send him off with a big,trusting smile but I know from experience too much trust is not always a good thing. Wish I felt differently.

Kelley with Amy's Angels October 7, 2009 at 9:10 AM  

Stopping over from SITS!

To answer the question--are you kidding? Help him pack, load the car, drive him to the airport, kiss him and leave in a cloud of dust!

My fiance' and I have no issues with that, and we actually encourage each other to go off and have fun without one another. We trust each other.

And let's be honest--while we love being with one another, we also like our time alone too. Trips like this don't happen every weekend. Homecoming is once a year. Let him go! Besides, unless the "college years" were just last spring, he'll probably discover that he can't party it up like he used too. : )

Theta Mom October 7, 2009 at 9:12 AM  

If he's never given you any reason to doubt him before, then this should be no different, right? My question would be why he is going alone, though-just to hang with the boys? If that's the case, an all out girls weekend would be planned! Just found your blog from SITS and it is so
ad-or-ab-le!

Patois October 7, 2009 at 9:46 AM  

It really does depend on my history with him. But let me say that if I didn't trust him enough to go, I wouldn't be with him.

La'Tonya Richardson October 7, 2009 at 11:36 AM  

I think you are so dead on with this one.

After careful evaluation, an awesome weekend would be just what the Dr. ordered.

Felicia - I complete Me October 7, 2009 at 1:16 PM  

Great advice Wifey!! This weekend is my husband's Homecoming weekend and I so want to go. My husband actually doesn't have a problem with me going but I chose to go up to NY and spend some quality time with my mom. I have been to my husband's homecoming before and I so see how the ladies look at him. But I trust my husband. Besides I would want my husband to trust me if I was going out with the girls. My husband has never given me any reason to doubt him so I won't start now. Life Wifey said make it a girls weekend so you can take your mind of off things or do something special for yourself. I know we all need to treat ourselves. I hope you enjoy your weekend.

MamaLuv42 October 7, 2009 at 1:18 PM  

Hi Just came by from Sits, Absence makes the heart grow fonder. he will probably miss you more than you miss him. Let the boys be boys!

Jane October 7, 2009 at 2:20 PM  

Time apart is sometimes the best thing to help you appreciate each other. Trust is so important - but there needs to be opportunity to let trust do it's thing.

Keep It Classy, Jen October 7, 2009 at 2:28 PM  

I think you gave great advice here. At any point we feel we are scared to let our husbands have a night with the boys, we must reevaluate whether or not we trust them.

A Mom on Spin October 7, 2009 at 5:25 PM  

Once again you have given stellar advice!

Shanny October 7, 2009 at 7:23 PM  

I agree with Wifey 100%
I completely trust my husband so I would definitely have no problem with him going. I hope that its just a bit of jealousy on Mrs. Homecoming King part and not something deeper. Definitely plan a girl's weekend, it will help a lot!

Cairo Typ0 October 8, 2009 at 5:39 AM  

Great advice as always, Wifey! Trust is always a tough issue in marriages and i like how you confronted the issue. :)

Mrs Cooper October 8, 2009 at 8:54 AM  

Haha, I'd be sending him on his merry way and planning my weeked out at the same time. This way you're not sitting at home sulking and worrying about what he's doing.

Also, how long ago was college. Consider the fact that people's physic's have changed. Even though they still might be good looking, they are are not early 20 anymmore. That alone would secure me if I had any concerns.

QueenBee October 8, 2009 at 10:39 AM  

Tell him to go but at the same time, tell him you will not be sitting at home because you've got things to do. That'll keep him wondering.

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