Holiday Shake Up

Wifey's Weekly Q and A

Dear Wifey:

I’m starting to get nervous with the holidays coming up. This is our newlywed year and the first time we have to deal with where to go for the holidays. We both have big families and normally spend the holidays with our own. Both of our families live in two different states. How can we be in two places at once? Help, please!

- Mrs. Holiday Shake Up

Dear Mrs. Holiday Shake Up:

First of all take a deep breath. I realize this is a big obstacle for many families, but by addressing it early I’m sure you will find a workable solution. Getting nervous and stressing out will only make things worse. Unfortunately, you can’t be in two places at once, but you do have two major holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas or Hanukkah) coming and can split them up between the two families. Dividing the two is a common remedy that often satisfies most. Hopefully your families will be supportive and understanding, but you should know that it’s impossible to please everyone.

Start having conversations with your husband now about what is important about the holidays to both of you; and to your families. It might take a series of conversations to hash it out, but once you both make a decision stand united and share it sooner than later so that your families have time to digest it, too. Remember this is an adjustment for everyone so be sympathetic, but don’t fall prey to guilt trips. Enjoy the time you’ll have with each family and look forward to starting new traditions of your own.

Winks & Smiles,

How about you? How does your family handle the holidays? Do you split them up? Alternate years? Make everyone come to you? Wives everywhere want to know ...

The advice on this site is intended to be helpful, but is not meant to take the place of marital counseling, legal advice, financial advice or any other professional service. If you feel you need professional help, it is encouraged for you to get some.