Are You Married to a Sports Fanatic?

Monday, March 30, 2009

In honor of March Madness, I thought this would be appropriate:

Ten signs of a sports fanatic...

Your husband’s score is determined by how many signs apply to him. Give your hubby one point for every behavior that applies.

1. He watches ESPN's SportsCenter more than three times in a row. SportsCenter, a daily sports news show, often re-airs the same show several times a day until the next one is produced. It's like watching the same Entertainment Tonight more than once.

2. He listens to sports radio every time he’s in the car and thinks the “2 Live Stews" should run for political office. The “2 Live Stews" are two brothers who have one of the most popular nationally syndicated sports talk shows in the country. Think The View for men — hot topics and all.

3. He’s superstitious and has to wear his team’s jersey, baseball hat, underwear, socks or some sort of paraphernalia while watching the game. He’ll even pull it out of the dirty laundry if it’s not clean. OK, I’m not telling on Napoleon here, but let’s just say I can vouch for this one from firsthand experience.

4. If his team loses, you can pretty much forget the romantic dinner that you planned for later. His mood is ruined as if he missed the game-winning field goal himself.

5. His idea of the perfect trip is traveling across country by plane, train or automobile to tailgate (enjoy barbecue and beer) in the parking lot of the stadium where his favorite team plays even if he doesn’t have tickets to go in and see the game. Being in the parking lot is enough for him.

6. He really can’t understand why his team’s bean bag, blanket, throw pillows, lamp and football-shaped clock do not go with the decor of your living room. Refer to the Living Together chapter; this is exactly why every man should have his own space in your home.

7. He can’t remember your birth date, how old his mother is, or to pick up the dry-cleaning on his way home from work, but he can tell you who won the 1982 Super Bowl (the San Francisco 49ers) and recite all of the game statistics, including who quarterbacked, how many yards he threw for, what the defense did, and give you an announcer’s style descriptive play-by-play of the entire game.

8. He thinks NASCAR would be a great name for your first child. Boy or girl.

9. He seriously suggested borrowing against his 401k or taking out a second mortgage on your house to buy one season ticket for his favorite team. One. That means even if you want to, you don’t get to go.

10. He enters every “biggest fan” contest dying for the opportunity to live out his childhood (and grown-man) fantasies — stepping into the batter’s box and slugging a homerun out of the ballpark; throwing that halftime, half-court basketball shot in front of thousands of screaming fans; or receiving a kick and returning it the entire length of the football field.

See how your husband scores.

1-3 is mild — Consider yourself lucky and go with the flow.

4-7, moderate — It can get pretty intense, but be patient and set parameters. Give his favorite sport a try or take advantage of the time to do something for yourself.

8 or more, maniac — Your man has the potential to get out of control. You and your husband need to come up with “game rules” to keep him and you from going crazy. If you two can’t communicate and compromise effectively — in the off season so that he can be objective — seek a referee or professional help, and pray that his team has a winning season.

Winks & Smiles,

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Excerpted from the book, Help! I’m a Newlywed … What Do I Do Now: Wife-Saving Advice Every New Bride Must Know to Survive the First Year of Marriage (30 Miles Media, Inc.).


She Writes

Friday, March 27, 2009

Tomorrow, Saturday, March 28, I'm moderating a panel at She Writes, a day long event for all members of the writing community. It will serve as a way to connect published writers, aspiring writers, journalists, commercial writers, creative writers, publishers and literary agents through a series of panels, seminars and workshops.

The details are:

March 28: 10 am – 5 pm
Decatur Library
215 Sycamore St
Decatur, GA 30030

The panel I’m participating in begins at 3 p.m. and features Stephanie Jones (The Enemy Between My Legs) and Goldie Taylor (January Girl). The event is FREE and open to the public. To register, visit Gift bags will be given out to the first 60 registered attendees.

If you’re in the Atlanta Metro area, maybe I'll see you there.

Winks & Smiles,

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Self Shower Blues

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Dear Wifey:

I am having my third baby soon, and I am planning on throwing myself a baby shower. Despite having two other children I've never had a baby shower, so I didn't think there was anything wrong with throwing one, but when I told our families and friends no one seemed supportive or interested, and several of them made rude comments about how it is inappropriate to have a shower for your third child, "especially when we just had a baby of the same gender less than two years ago."

We're not having a traditional shower – it's going to be co-ed and more like a baby-themed barbecue with games and presents – but people still seem to be uninterested/offended. Part of me is afraid that no one will show up, and part of me is afraid that they'll all show up and behave badly. Is there any way to change their attitudes so that everyone can just show up and have a nice time?

- Mrs. Self Shower Blues

Dear Mrs. Self Shower Blues:

While throwing yourself a baby shower may not be “politically correct,” it’s the new millennium and new rules apply. Still, there are many “traditional” folks who like to stick to the “traditional” rules. Instead of focusing on changing their attitudes, perhaps changing your approach might be more beneficial. Start by nixing the word shower and using, “barbecue,” “celebration” or “soiree.” It sounds more inviting and a lot less “traditional.”

The presumption that you are expecting presents might also leave some folks with a bad taste. Inviting people to celebrate the birth of your third child without requesting a present or supplying a registry list comes across a tad more tactful and might even insight some really thoughtful gifts.

Throwing your own party is fine, but it’s important to set a welcoming, tasteful tone. If you do that many of your family and friends will probably come around and look forward to celebrating your new baby. Unfortunately, you can’t control people’s attitudes or stop them from behaving badly, but you can plan a fun day and extend an invitation for them to share in your excitement with you. Once you change your presentation, you should be able to gauge how people are receiving it. Welcome the positive people with open arms and don’t give any energy to the negative ones - you’re going to need all of your energy for your precious new baby.

Winks & Smiles,

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Ever thrown your own shower? Or, attend one when someone had? Do you think it’s inappropriate? Don’t be shy; your tactful two cents are welcome…

The advice on this site is intended to be helpful, but is not meant to take the place of marital counseling, legal advice, financial advice or any other professional service. If you feel you need professional help, it is encouraged for you to get some.


Travel Show Giveaway: And the Winner is…

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

I am happy to announce a winner was chosen at random to receive the beautiful Venetian blown glass bottle stopper I brought back from my trip to the Mediterranean.

Before I name the lucky winner I would like to express my appreciation for everyone’s participation in the contest and for watching the show, “Great Cruises: Why Not the Mediterranean?” that aired on the Travel Channel this past Saturday night. I had an awesome time on the trip and am so glad that I could share it with you.

I know, I know … blah, blah, blah. Get to the winner already, right? This is the closest that I’ll ever get to an Oscar speech so excuse me for milking the moment.

OK. And, the winner is …


Congratulations to Mammatalk for winning the bottle stopper, but wait ... there’s more! My friends at Royal Caribbean were kind enough to send me a few goodies to add to the contest. So in addition to the bottle stopper, I have two more prizes to giveaway.

The first one is a Royal Caribbean Europe Cruisetours short sleeve polo shirt. The winner, chosen at random, is Lynn from Natural & Organic Body Care. Congratulations, Lynn.

The other prize is a Royal Caribbean Europe Cruisetours Celebrity X Cruise heavy weight fleece vest that goes to Diamond Emory for submitting the most entries in the contest. Thanks for blasting it out!

Ladies, please send your addresses to so I can forward your prizes.

If you missed the show on Saturday you can click here to see a short clip.

Thanks, Winks & Smiles,

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Travel Show Giveaway: Last Day to Win!

Monday, March 23, 2009

The Travel Channel show “Great Cruises: Why Not the Mediterranean?” featuring me and my girlfriends aired this past Saturday night. In case you missed it here’s a link to a short clip of the show.

Fortunately you haven’t missed your opportunity to win this little gem:

A beautiful blown glass bottle stopper I brought back from Venice, Italy. The giveaway ends tonight so click here to put your name – and bottle – in the running.

Winks & Smiles,

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Wifey's Cruise Show Commercial

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I was watching “Dhani Tackles the Globe” on The Travel Channel last night and then saw this …

A commercial for my show airing this Saturday night at 8 p.m. Yes, that’s me lounging by the pool, belly dancing on the ship, ahem, and strolling on the beach in Barcelona.

If you haven’t already put your name in the running to win the goodie I brought back with me from Venice please click here. I won’t ask for much ... just a little love.

Oh, and don’t forget to set your DVR’s.

Winks & Smiles,

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Wifey's Mediterranean Cruise and a Gift for You

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Wifey went to Italy and all she brought me back was …

… this beautiful Venetian blown glass bottle stopper.

It’s that time. My girlfriends getaway to the Mediterranean will air on The Travel Channel as a part of their “Great Cruises” series this Saturday, March 21, at 8 p.m. (check your local listings to confirm times). Last October two of my closest girlfriends and I took a Royal Caribbean Cruisetour to several cities in Spain, France and Italy. Click here to read more.

I’m so excited about the show airing that I thought it’d be great to share a little piece of the Mediterranean with you. I picked up this gem exploring the tiny streets – and shops – in Venice. I love pretty things, especially when they dress up pretty bottles of wine, ahem.

Seriously, I’m not going to send you on a wild goose chase to be the chosen one – I know how busy you are – but I will ask you for a little bit of love.

There’s several ways to win and they all count as separate entries. Drumroll please…

1. Follow me. That’s right, you guessed it. Head on over to the sidebar and click that infamous button or subscribe to this blog via RSS feed.
2. Write a post on your blog to share details about the show and contest with your readers.
3. Twitter a link to this post promoting the show and the contest.
4. Watch the show then come back and tell me what color wrap I wore in Venice.

Easy, right?

While I work on the honor system, I still need you to leave me a comment on this post and tell me which and how many of the things you do did so I can put you in the running to win. I’d love to see your links so the rest of us can visit you, too. The contest will stay open until Monday, March 23, 11:59 p.m. EST., and I’ll announce the winner one week from today, March 24.

So, what are you waiting for? I’m sure you’ve got a bottle of something, somewhere that’s waiting to get dressed up.

Winks & Smiles,

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Make Sure You Check Your Girls

Monday, March 16, 2009

You didn’t ask but I’m just sayin’…

Make sure you check your girls.

Not your sisters or your BFFs. Your “girls.” Your breasts, your boobs, or whatever cute little nickname you like to call them.

Last summer at a routine doctor’s appointment my gynecologist found a small mass in my left breast. He sent me for a mammogram and ultrasound – just to “check it out.” Fortunately for me it turned out to be nothing but some dense breast tissue, but for approximately 200,000 women every year it’s more than that – it’s breast cancer.

Last week I went for a six-month follow up and again was given good news. Before I could step down from the table, the ultrasound technician – a passionate twenty-something-year-old woman who probably has to deliver bad news more often than she’d like – impressed upon me to be diligent in doing self-exams.

“If you feel anything in question you come and get it checked out,” she said with a smile. “It only takes a few minutes, and it could save your life.”

She’s right. So often we tend to neglect ourselves. We sacrifice our sanity, our health and our bodies for a never ending list of things we feel we have to do. Often breast cancer can be cured if it’s caught early enough. What wasn’t detectable at your last doctor’s appointment can surface three months later. If you’re not doing your own exams it could be nine long months before your doctor finds it. Ahem, ladies, do I really need to tell you what can happen in nine long months?

So, I’m just sayin’ …

Make sure to check your girls.

Add that to your never ending list … and make sure to put it toward the top.

Winks & Smiles,

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One Fit Mommy

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Exercising, eating healthy and taking care of me are practices I strive hard to incorporate into my everyday life, so I was thrilled when one of my favorite bloggers, Lisa at Workout Mommy, decided to feature me as “One Fit Mommy!”

As wives, mothers, sisters, girlfriends, daughters, and CEOs in and outside of our homes, finding the time to exercise is often low on our priority list. If we ever steal a moment to take care of ourselves we often scurry off to the salon to get our ‘do done, our nails painted and we can’t forget the ever necessary pedicure. I love slipping out to the spa just as much as the next girl, but I also love the feeling I get from working out. The energy, the confidence, and the clarity it gives often gets me through the day.

You can read more about my story and get lots of great exercise tips at Workout Mommy. She’s always up on the latest trends, products and has the best contests, too – I won a fabulous pair jeans a couple months ago! Stop by, show her some love and make sure to tell her Wifey sent you…

Winks & Smiles,

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Missed Birthday Blues

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Dear Wifey:

My father-in-law’s birthday was last week and we missed it. My husband totally forgot about it. I really don’t think my father-in-law minded, but my mother-in-law clearly did. I can’t believe my husband didn’t remember and what’s worse is his mother implied that I was the one who forgot. I feel guilty, but had no idea it was his birthday. My husband told her it was his fault, but I still get the feeling that all eyes are on me. Should I say something to her to clear the air?

- Mrs. Missed Birthday Blues

Dear Mrs. Missed Birthday Blues:

Missing family birthdays suck, but, at least it wasn’t your mother-in-law’s – I’m sure the wrath would have been much worse.

Of course all eyes are on you. You’re the wife now, and unless you and your husband have a specific understanding, most birthday responsibilities automatically fall on you. It might sound sexist, but it’s true. If this is something that you just can’t handle, speak up now so that you and your husband can find an alternate plan, otherwise, call your mother-in-law, let her know that you never want to miss anyone’s birthday again and then ask her to open up her date book.

Once she agrees, grab your own notebook (you should have one to keep all new family information that you think you’ll remember but won’t like birthdays, phone numbers, how people are related, who stops by for unexpected visits, etc.) and write down everyone’s birthday – even if you don’t plan on sending them a card. Power is in knowledge. Put the key family members into your organizer and make a note for those who need a special fuss.

It sounds like a lot, but it’s really not. You’ll eventually remember them without prompting, but until you do, avoid the guilt and the blame; and simply write them down.

Winks & Smiles,

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Are you the date keeper in your house? Ever miss a birthday or anniversary? How do you keep track? Wondering wives want to know…

The advice on this site is intended to be helpful, but is not meant to take the place of marital counseling, legal advice, financial advice or any other professional service. If you feel you need professional help, it is encouraged for you to get some.


Wifey’s Travel Channel Debut

Monday, March 9, 2009

Last October two of my girlfriends and I boarded Royal Caribbean’s Brilliance of the Seas and embarked on a two week cruisetour throughout the Mediterranean. Madrid, Toledo, Barcelona, Cannes, Florence, Venice and Capri are just a few of the fabulous cities we explored.

On Saturday, March 21, at 8 p.m. The Travel Channel will feature my getaway on its “Great Cruises” series. Make sure to set your DVR’s and check back here – I brought back a goodie from Venice to giveaway to a lucky reader.

If you’d like to read more about my trip you can click here or here. In the meantime, here’s a few pictures from my amazing adventure.

Wanda and Wifey arrive in Madrid.

The princesses at Madrid's Royal Palace.

Beautiful Barcelona.

Captivating Capri.

Me, Wanda, and my sister, Nicole, arriving in Venice.

Ah, getting away with my girlfriends was great. When’s the last time you took a trip? Traveling minds want to know…

Winks & Smiles,

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Me Time … You Mean for ME?

Thursday, March 5, 2009

That’s right. Me Time. For you.

Husband, the baby, kids, homework, extracurricular activities, work, meetings, doctors appointments, parents, laundry, cleaning (insert the rest of the never ending list here).

When’s the last time you had a little Me Time?

Don’t laugh or start calling me nasty names. I’m serious. Me Time is a crucial component in keeping your family, your household, and yourself sane.

When I was in the thick of taking care of a newborn, a very active two year-old, juggling a full time job and running my house I NEVER had a moment to myself. One day I discovered the only time I really got a reprieve was in the bathroom. Not to take a shower, but to sit on the throne as my grandmother so graciously calls it. Suddenly I became the most regular chick on the block. Not really, but I had no shame in grabbing a magazine and whispering pitifully into Husband’s ear, “Dear, I’ll be back in a few minutes. I really have to go to the bathroom.”

And it worked. For awhile. Until Husband got concerned that something might seriously be wrong with my stomach.

Five years later I don’t have to sneak off into the bathroom to get Me Time, but I do have to consciously pencil it into my hectic schedule or it just won’t happen.

Slip out to the spa, get your workout on, relax in a bath, shop ‘til you drop, blog without interruption, ahem, find something that makes you happy then make arrangements to do it.

When’s the last time YOU took some Me Time? And what did you do? Overscheduled moms need to know…

Winks & Smiles,

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Helpful Husband ... and Exercise Everyday

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Wifey's Weekly Q and A

Dear Wifey:

My husband has a long-time female friend that has been overstepping her bounds. I know their relationship is platonic, but sometimes she’s confused and acts like he’s her man. She calls on him to fix her computer, to help her with her yard, if her car breaks down, and anything else that a woman wants her man to do. He’s married now and needs to be at home with me taking care of my “honey-do list” not hers. I want to tell her to back off, what should I say?

- Mrs. Helpful Husband

Dear Mrs. Helpful Husband:

I wouldn’t say anything to her, especially without addressing your husband first. Start with him, but tackle this carefully. You don’t want to come across like the jealous-whiney wife. Have a simple but serious conversation with him explaining that you are completely comfortable with their friendship, but not with her monopolizing his time. Don’t get into girlfriend talk with your husband, “you’re my man, not hers, blah, blah, blah,” he won’t get it and will probably start to tune you out. Let him know that he's needed at home, too, and while occasionally helping her is fine, perhaps making himself not so accessible to her every call would be best for everyone.

Don’t put demands on him – that often leads to a rebellious reaction – instead give him some time to react positively. If he doesn’t respond the way you like, a second more detail conversation might be needed. Continue to keep your cool and ask him to look at things from your shoes. Would he want you cooking, cleaning and writing thank you notes for your male friends while he’s sitting at home? Sometimes a peek at what could be is enough to inspire change. I’m willing to bet that’ll make him suggest she get AAA roadside service and a new landscaper, too.

Winks & Smiles,

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Dear Wifey:

I don’t know if it’s marriage, the baby, or age (I just turned 35), but I’m about 20 pounds heavier than I used to be. I don’t like the way I look or feel. I’m ready to make a change but the thought of exercising everyday is horrifying. Do I really have to do it or can I just skip a meal or two?

- Mrs. Exercise Everyday

Dear Mrs. Exercise Everyday:

No and No!

No, you do not have to exercise everyday. Your body needs time to rest. Exercising everyday can actually be counterproductive and may lead to injury and burnout. I recommend starting at three days a week and working your way up to five. You should try to incorporate a mix of cardiovascular activity, strength training and stretching into your exercise plan. Start with finding something that’s not so horrifying for you to do. Do you like to walk, play tennis or do workout tapes in your own home? Pick something that can get you going. You might want to consider working with a personal trainer to get you started on a safe plan tailored to your needs; and remember to see your doctor before starting any exercise program.

And no, do not skip meals. That is one of the worst things you can do to lose weight. When you miss meals your body goes into starvation mode and holds on to everything you consume, often leading to weight gain. Your body needs fuel to function. A nutritionist can put together a healthy meal plan filled with delicious foods to help you meet your goals. If you want to do this solo, there are plenty of good resources on-line and on bookshelves to get you started.

Winks & Smiles,

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Got two cents? Don’t be shy, leave a comment and share your thoughts. Got a question? E-mail Wifey at

The advice on this site is intended to be helpful, but is not meant to take the place of marital counseling, legal advice, financial advice or any other professional service. If you feel you need professional help, it is encouraged for you to get some.


Lock and Knock

Monday, March 2, 2009

You didn’t ask but I’m just sayin’ …

Is it karma, payback or God’s sense of humor that every time Husband and I lock the door to get our groove on one of our children comes knocking on it?

OK, maybe not EVERY time, but enough that it makes me wonder. Do children have some sixth sense that alerts them when their parents are about to embark in some good ol’ fashion love making? Don’t they know that when Mama’s happy everybody’s happy and they should let Mama be happy every now and then?

It’s hard enough to find the time to lock the door so when I finally do the last thing I want to hear is a knock on it. And it doesn’t matter what time of the day or night it is – a midnight night escapade or a 6 a.m. quickie – I’m always prepared to hear:

Knock, knock, knock … "Mama, why is the door locked?"

To keep your little ass out!

No, I don’t really say that – out loud anyway – but soon their going to be old enough to know why the door is locked then my conspiracy theory will be confirmed. Until then, I’ll continue to shoo them away with the quickest – and cleanest – thing that comes to mind.

Do your kids come knocking as soon as you turn the lock? And what do you tell them? Door lockin’ mamas want to know…

Winks & Smiles,

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This blog is a personal blog written and edited by me. This blog accepts forms of cash advertising, sponsorship, paid insertions, products, event tickets, travel and other forms of compensation. The owner of this blog may be compensated to provide opinion on products, services, websites and various other topics. Even though the owner of this blog may receive compensation for a post or advertisements, we always give our honest opinions, findings, beliefs, or experiences on those topics or products. The views and opinions expressed on this blog are purely the bloggers' own. Any product claim, statistic, quote or other representation about a product or service should be verified with the manufacturer, provider or party in question. This blog does not contain any content that might present a conflict of interest.

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